In the almost six months since I have stopped drinking, I spend the majority of my mental energy trying to come up with legitimate reasons to begin drinking again. This process takes place in a question-and-answer format. I call it The Game. Below are two simple examples.

Q: If I got a great new job, and after the first day my co-workers took me out to a bar, could I have just one drink?

A: No. Who knows how you�ll feel after having one drink? You may want to have more and how horrible would it be to get shit-faced in front of these new co-workers? Plus, why celebrate a positive event with a reminder of the most negative thing in your life?

Or, on the other hand:

Q: If I suddenly get laid off from my job, can I go to a bar and get drunk?

A: No. You�ll just be making things worse. You�ll need your sobriety in your difficult job search.

Now that I�m thinking about The Game, I realize that I even played it while I was still drinking. It just had a different outcome.

Q: I�m bummed. My day sucked and I should, by rights, have a much cooler life. Can I get home and get wasted while watching a Cops marathon?

A: Hell yeah. You deserve it. You�ll feel so much better after the first few drinks. And you�ve got your shit totally together compared to people on Cops.

Or:

Q: Yay! I�m totally psyched. I�m going out with my friends and it�s spring and everyone�s going to be out. Can I drink so much I won�t even remember anything about this perfect evening?

A: Hell yeah. That�s what life�s all about, isn�t it?

Though I�m kind of discouraged by how much I play The Game, I think it helps me recognize all kinds of reasons not to drink. Also, it makes me aware of possible temptations and helps me plan for them before they happen. Below are examples of Game situations that really happened.

Q: My best friend�s getting married. We�ve been drinking together since college. I can drink at her wedding, right, for God�s sake?

A. No. She understands why you stopped so there�s certainly no pressure from her. Getting wasted and making an ass of yourself won�t make a precious memory. And this will be a great opportunity to present yourself as a non-drinking person to people you�ve just met, while having good friends who know the whole story there for support.

And:

Q: I just found out my father has cancer. The diagnosis is not great. He�s going on chemo and it�s going to be really tough. Can I drink?

A: No, no, no! Now more than ever, you need to have your shit together. Do you want your mother worrying about you right now? Do you want to be passed out cold when your family calls with important news? No. You need to be strong, and that means you need to be sober.

So The Game has its benefits. But the truth is, the ideal outcome of The Game would be a �yes� answer -- that is, a situation that would totally legitimize my starting to drink again.

Lately my Game questions have been dealing with dismemberment.

Q: If my leg is severed before my eyes in an accident, and someone who happens to be standing there offers me a drink, can I take it?

A: Maybe.

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