In less than a month, it�ll be a year since I decided to stop drinking. This anniversary is making me nervous.

Let�s say sobriety is like riding on a train. I can jump off the moving train anytime I want, but I�d probably hurt myself. Occasionally, though, the train stops at a station where it�d be easy for me to get off. For example, New Year�s eve was a station. The one-year mark is a station. The stations are tempting. Everyone else is getting off and being welcomed by friends. I�m looking out the window.

I find the train allegory useful, and I tried to explain it at a recent Smart Recovery meeting. It didn�t go over too well. In fact, someone implied that my interest in trains was really an interest in something else, like in a Freudian way. Everybody thought that was pretty funny. They can all ride a big train right up my butt. Not really! Not really!

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